Friday, October 17, 2008

Emotional infidelity...

"It's cold tonight,innit?"

"Do you need a jacket?I can run downsairs and grab one."

"Na.It's fine.Sipping wine is warm enough."

"So how was your day?"

"Not great.My son din't get into the school football team.He's been answering me in monosyllables for a week now.And my daughter thinks I hate her."

"Ah.Teenage angst.How old are they anyway?The last time I saw your son,I guess he was 8."

"He is 13 now.My girl is 18.Time slips through like sand,doesn't it?"

"Yeah.I have stopped counting the years I have been trying to..."

"I understand."

"She won't let me not try,you know.She just can't accept it-my helplessness and her failure."

"I hope everything will be fine.I can't imagine how hard it must be for her."

"That's the problem.Everyone knows her story-her longing,her desperation.What about me?Am I just a tool for her happiness,literally and figuratively?It's not that I don't want a kid.I can keep going on if I see even a glimpse of hope.I just can't..."

"Take your time."

"I just can't see the look on her face after every negative result.I see my own inadequency etched on her face.I'm tired..."

"Life sucks huh?Tell me about it!I got a call from a hotel in Ooty last week.They told me that my husband and his 'wife' had left behind a bag in the honeymoon suite."

"Oh.I'm so sorry."

"Don't be.He isn't that dumb you know,to give them his residence number.He wanted me to find out,I guess."

"That makes it worse."

"Just the same.He never cared for me anyway.Atleast he was considerate enough to let me know and save me all the trouble of finding out.Ironic."

"Did you confront him?"

"It isn't necessary.He understood.I'm mellow now.Acceptance looks so easy on the surface doesn't it?"

"Are you going to separate?"

"Would you?"

"That's not my answer."

"I can't tell that thought hasn't crossed my mind.But I can never do that to my kids.They are all I have."

"That's not true."

"I know"

"You do?"

"Isn't that kinda implicit?"

"Thank you for that.She says 'I love you' so many times,the words chain me with moral obligation."

"Don't we all?More often than not obligation is something you din't wish for."

"Isn't that why it becomes an obligation?"

"It does"

"It does"

"There's no moon tonight.Don't you love it that way?"

"Yes.The sky gives me companionship in my darkness."

"What about the stars?"

"There's always something to hold on to"

"I know"

"I'm glad you do"

"What say?Let's drink our troubles away?While your wife awaits her non-virile husband....."

"And your extra virile husband awaits his mistress....."

"Cheers"

"Cheers"

2 comments:

Preeti Hegde said...

beautiful! well written..

Soumya said...

Read a couple of your blogs. Many are well presented.. this one, definitely touched..

Regards